I've had three "natural" pregnancies... and now working on my third "super-natural" kind. As a mom who's BTDT in both ways... I'd be hard pressed to pick my favorite way to become a mommy. I remember the months of wondering if I could possibly love a child from my heart as much as the ones from my "flesh"... until they put Kate into my arms and all wondering turned to wonder! It all seems so much the same and yet wonderfully different at the same time!
I remember when I was pregnant for Russ... I must have read and then re-read each chapter of "What To Expect When You're Expecting" a million times! It was all pretty "cut and dried" and you needed only refer back to the book for each trimester of your pregnancy. How to deal with morning sickness (I should have written that chapter!), how much weight you should gain and when you should gain it (at NO OTHER TIME in a woman's life would this be remotely acceptable!), when you should feel the baby move, and how to relieve the heartburn as it grows. Every month you get to visit your doctor to check your progress and plan for your due date... which is an ACTUAL date!! :-) The doctor assures you that if your body decides to surpass that date... he will actually have to do something about it and force it to happen! (Wouldn't it be wonderful if doctors could "induce" TA's???) This, if you haven't figured it out, is the most significant difference in being biologically pregnant and being "paper-pregnant". This very significant difference more than levels the playing field in terms of the process of "labor". And take it from me... you "birth" moms 'aint got NOTHIN' on adoptive moms! In the pregnancy of an adoption there is NO due date, NO expectation or acceptance of weight gain, NO book on how to deal with the stress and "heartburn" of dossier prep, NO doctor to promise to "induce" you should this take longer than expected, and most importantly... there are NO epidurals!!!
There is one similarity though, and it's one that I love! Sonograms!... especially the new 3D kind of sonograms where you can actually make out some of the features of your child... Is she sucking her thumb?... Is she really a she?... Is she active or quiet?... Is she big or small? In the adoption world sonograms are better known as.... VIDEOS!!! Health insurance policies won't cover the cost of them... but you'd willingly pay BIG bucks out of your own pocket for them!
All that to say... I received a "sonogram" recently!!! I could see all of Rachel's beautiful features!... Yes, she's a she!... she wasn't sucking her thumb, but she sure liked the lollipop they gave her!... She seemed kind of quiet, but extra SWEET!... and I got a video copy of it all! Want to see???...